PROMISE

Every Saturday he would come and sit in front of me and I couldn’t take my eyes off him. He is the most wonderful part of my world, or at least what was left of it. The sadness in his eyes would kill me. Yet in spite of the sorrow his face was angelic. Nothing I could ever imagine to be more stunning than his face.

Rahul, the most beautiful name in my world, is my life. It had been much time since I saw that breath taking smile of his that always made me feel blessed.

Though we love each other more than anything else yet we broke up on the day he proposed me. There was no specific reason; a little mistake on our part and our relationship was over. At first he was too angry with me for the loss of our relationship. He blamed me. He was utterly infuriated with me but gradually he accepted that it was over.

After a month of break up, he came to meet me and since then we spend every Saturday afternoon and evenings together. I must say he hasn’t missed a single Saturday. He would bring me orchids, my favorite. At times he would get me chocolates and even candies. I love spending time with him.

In the beginning he asked me to return to him a couple of times, but when he realized that this topic made me sad, he never brought it up again. We would talk for hours together; he would tell me about what he did all week and how much he missed me.

Although it had been about two years since we broke up, he still carries our picture in his wallet. I remember the first time he put that picture in his wallet, he said, “It will always remain here, I will show this to our children someday”. He kept his words. Though the latter part of his words won’t ever come true, still it made me feel special in knowing that he cared so much for me, even after all I put him through.

I am Rekha. I met Rahul five years ago in college. Since the first time we met, there was some unseen force that pulled us towards each other and we kept meeting again and again just by chance, it was later that I came to know that those “co-incidences” were very carefully planned by Rahul and his friends.

After being friends with him, I came to know him better and my life started revolving around him. It was like he had a force much greater than gravitational force that invariably pulled me towards him. He would stay on my mind all day. To my delight, we started spending most of the time together and after 4months of “friendship”, he finally said he loved me. I was already head over heels for him…

On our first date, he took me to the outskirts of the city where we watched the sunset together. I was very happy. He understood me much better than myself and I couldn’t have imagined a better person than him. As a couple we fought very little, and he would always do something crazy that would make me forget about getting angry at him. He was, still is my perfect man.

But a patch up was impossible. What had been done couldn’t be undone. But we met every week and he would talk about his problems, would listen to mine.

One day while we were sitting together, he told me that his parents want him to marry. He was sad about it. No matter how much I tried to make him understand that he should move on in life, and there was no point in waiting for me, he wouldn’t listen.

I surely wanted him to start his life anew, but some part of me was so selfish that I couldn’t even dare to imagine him with another girl. But I wanted him to get married. I knew for sure that there was no possibility of “we” between me and him.

He told me, “I know you want me to start a life, but don’t you even think that I ever will think of anyone else than you. My love, my life is only and only for you and there is not even a spec of space for another girl in my heart”

I asked him, “what if I don’t want you anymore? Still you would want me?”

He didn’t answer to that. He always did that. Whenever I would ask him something important, he wouldn’t answer.

The next Saturday he “came to me and said, “I have told my parents I won’t ever marry in life”

I was shocked. I asked” but why?”

He said “the only girl I want to marry will never be mine but I am his for all eternity”

 I had cried that night after he left. Tears that were so well buried inside me welled up and I let them flow for I had the comfort that he wasn’t here to see me all crying like that.

Some days he will come and not talk at all. He will sit beside me and keep looking at me. The pain in his eyes would tear my soul apart. His silent tears would burn me like acid. Lord knows how much I want to hold his face that time, to kiss away all those tears, to hug him, but I would stop myself coz I know that will make him weaker still. And I was his strength, perhaps his weakness as well.

Today I am worried. Though it’s a Wednesday, yet he was supposed to visit me today. It’s my birthday after all. He never missed my birthdays, no matter on what days it came. Even after its two years since our relationship is over, he was always the first one to wish me. He would get me a dark forest cake [my favorite again] and lots and lots of balloons. He did something special on ever birthday of mine. He would light up my whole place with candles and would sit beside me till all the candles burn out.

But he was late today, and he is never late. As the clock is ticking by, I am getting more anxious. It was almost evening when Raj, his younger brother came up to me, placed the flowers and cake on my steps and went away. I asked him what’s wrong, but he didn’t answer me.

Its Saturday today. I was damn sue Rahul will come to meet me. But I waited in vain. He didn’t come.

The next week seemed to drag on… there was no news of him. At a point I thought perhaps he actually moved on with his life and now I was only but a past to him. Then again I was divided between the good and bad in me. My good part said I should be happy and my bad part clashed with it saying that he promised!

It was on the fine Tuesday morning that he came to me. It was very early, nearly dark, but the sense of his touch was so profound in my memory that I identified him. He came close to me and hugged me...

After a long long time, he released me. I looked at his face and there was my favorite breath taking smile on his face. He said softly “I love you. “

I was terribly angry! I shouted “what are you doing here?? You are not supposed to be here! Do you even know what it means??”

He let me whine and when I stopped he said, “I had to come because I knew you would be waiting.”

I said “please elaborate!!!”

He said with the smile on his face, “I had to come. I promised I would. But it took time and I am sorry for that. I had certain responsibilities, the foremost being Raj. I had to take care of his education before I could come to you. Now that he is married, he has a life and won’t need me anymore. I wanted to come to you on your birthday... but they wouldn’t let me go.”

He saw the frown on my face, but continued, “After you left me that day forever, I promised that I would soon join you. I wanted to spend my whole life with you. Do you know what sitting in front of your tombstone every Saturday did to me?  But I wasn’t at liberty to join you then, on your birthday, I could finally muster the strength to write a goodbye note and take some pills. Thank god they worked.  Now that I am free, I am yours and we are together again. Now nothing can separate us, not even death”

I simply looked at his face... He is truly my angel… who is with me in life as well as in death